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Tools to Keep Your Relationship Intact During Social Distancing

It’s safe to say that most couples have had some moments where they were ready to go bananas this past week. Tensions are high in a moment where working as a team is required in order to survive what’s happening.  The dynamic with Jesse and I goes like this:  I’m super vigilant (and probably annoying) […]

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It’s safe to say that most couples have had some moments where they were ready to go bananas this past week. Tensions are high in a moment where working as a team is required in order to survive what’s happening. 

The dynamic with Jesse and I goes like this: 

I’m super vigilant (and probably annoying) when it comes to precautions and super organized. Jesse would be the one cracking a joke when the ship was sinking? He’s more laid back which has turned out to be my saving grace this week. Luckily, we have been able to lock in and move as a unit successfully with a few tools

Honor each other’s space

If you are quarantined, you’ll probably be spending more time together than you ever have. Take some time to put on headphones and go into your own world and allow your partner to do the same. We all have different ways of handling adversity. Don’t take the need for space personally but use it as a tool to support each other. Make agreements and code words 

Create your own signals and code words

Develop your own shorthand and create your own way of communicating what your needs are effectively.  Be mindful of what you are saying especially in front of your babies if you have them. If you want to share info about the virus or an article you found that might be triggering, you may want to text them. Sounds crazy but it works.

Ask the other what they need. 

“What can I do for you?” is a great start. Do nice things for each other without prompting. A cup of tea, knocking out the dishes, drawing them a warm bath, or maybe their favorite chips. The key is to do it without being asked.

Now is the perfect time to explore how you can honor their love language in new ways. 

 Physical grounding

My goodness let me tell you, I wouldn’t be holding it together if we didn’t do this. When your partner is going off on a tangent, place our hands on the other person’s shoulder facing them. Walk them through some deep breathing while counting. Do this standing. Keep going until you feel the energy shift. Cry it out if you need to but once you’re done, hug and settle your spirit. This one works like magic.

Cook together: Find a Pinterest recipe that works with what you have and try something new. Save the canned goods for last.

Be kind

“Thank you for doing that. I appreciate you.”

It’s easy to snap at each other but try to remember we don’t have the option to compromise the energy in the space. Try to preserve it. Be patient with the other and release blaming. 

Chances are one of you could be sick. That’s the reality. If that happens, the other will need to become the caretaker. It’s important to remember that in times like these, we need each other more than ever.  We have to honor the other person’s individual experience. It can get a little crazy and it’s something none of us have ever experienced. We are stronger together

Intimacy can be challenged but my wish for you is to rise up when this is all over and become unbreakable.

Share with me in the comments some of the tips you have used to co-exist with your significant other during this time. Stay safe ya’ll. <3

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