Ok. So we all know that being a solopreneur isn’t easy. If you’re like most, you spend most of your time at your desk right? I thought so.
Here’s the thing: I’ve learned that isolation is a recipe for stagnation and many times leads to burnout. A Girl Tribe is a group of like-minded women who are all dedicated to their respective business goals. I did a full video on this topic below however if you prefer to read, the fully detailed transcript is underneath.
Don’t do anything unless you have set an intention. For example: Wanting something sounds like this, “Oh, I see those women working together and there’s a whole group of them and that looks so fun and I wish I had that…” That’s wanting.
Intentional is like saying, “It’s March 2019 and I want to have women around me who support me that I also support and I’m going to make that happen.”
You see the difference?
You’re sending a very clear signal to the Universe. You’re saying, “Listen, this is what I want and this is what I’m going to have.” So before you even try to meet one person, get intentional about your tribe. Say to yourself, “This is what I want”, and when you take steps, you’ve already set out to do it in an inspired way. So then it becomes an inspired action.
Your comfort zone is over with. I feel like social media has gotten us to a place where one on one interaction can be uncomfortable for a lot of people. But now that you’ve been intentional about wanting to build a tribe, now you’ve got to step out of your comfort zone. You’ve got to slide in some DMs. You’ve got to see an event for women and invite somebody who you’ve been following that you think would be a good match for you. Now listen, so many of us look at women who have “done more than us” or have become more successful and we spend all of our time looking at their success and reaching out and commenting, “Girl, you did that!”
But we don’t look to the left and right of us. There are so many entrepreneurs who are at your same level, who have wonderful business ideas, but they’re solopreneurs like you are. We need to stop looking up so often and start looking around. Because what’s going to happen is when she starts rising and you start rising, you guys are rising at the same time. Take some time out to really observe the girls who are around you that you could connect with. She may be a mom like you, she may be a student like you, but just take more time to observe because there’s so much value in working with the people who are on the same track as you.
It’s just like dating. If you’re trying to find your husband or your boyfriend or your girlfriend or whatever it may be, you’ve got to step out of your box. You’ve got to be like, “Okay, you know what? This is uncomfortable for me, but I said I was going to do this so I’m going to step to her.” You’ve got to challenge yourself to create the results that you want.
Always Add Value
When you become intentional about building a tribe, it can’t be all about what you need. You can’t have a list like, “Okay, I need a graphic designer in my life. I need a homegirl who knows how to do _____.” It can’t be all about you.
You have to think, “What do I have that I can offer someone that will be beneficial for them?”. Many times I see people who are only out to meet people who can help them in some way. These types of people want to meet someone to talk their ear off or pick their brain for free. They seem as if they want to be friends but then it becomes a consultation.
(Side note: that has happened to me so many times, y’all. When I first got to LA, I didn’t know anyone. I’ve had times where I thought I was making a new friend and it turns out to be something else. I’m like, “Girl, let me send you an invoice.”)
Just on your end, make sure that you’re adding value and you’re moving with integrity. People remember that about you. You didn’t come to take, you came to give, and that will always pay off in the end if you’re genuine and if you’re doing it from a place of being intentional.
One of the things that I learned when I got to LA is that people flake on each other and it’s normal. So then I got into that mode. I’m like, “Okay girl, we’ll do lunch, girl. Okay, girl, I’ll talk to you soon, girl.” Then neither one of you ever has any type of intention on ever talking to each other again or really getting together. But that’s the norm here. I had to make a conscious decision to be like, Nah. That’s not how I roll. If I say I’m coming to your event, I’m there and I’m on time. If I say that I’m going to help you with your site, I’m logging in and I’m doing it whenever I have free time and I’m going to tell you how much I’m going to do it for it.
Years ago, I became intentional about making sure that I was impeccable with my word. That’s an agreement that I’ve made with myself. Because when you are going out and trying to cultivate a tribe of women around you, you want to make sure that you’re the person that can be counted on from day one. So those are my favorite four tips and of course there are more and I want to open up this dialogue because I feel like it’s something that a lot of entrepreneurs struggle with, but the most important thing is that you don’t have to travel this journey by yourself because it is a crazy tough road and there are so many other entrepreneurs who are going through what you’re going through.
You don’t have to sit at that desk day after day by yourself. There are so many amazing women around you. Imagine having a tribe that supports each other, comes to each other’s events, shares resources, shares ideas, and gives each other feedback. It’s such an amazing dynamic and it’s my reason for making these videos. I want to open the conversation so we can come together. If nothing else comes out of these videos, I hope that you guys meet each other in the comments and maybe become business besties! I’ve met plenty of amazing women online. That’s my biggest goal with these kinds of topics. I encourage you all to connect. It’s worth the effort.
Here’s to new connections!